Pregnancy After Infertility


I’ve been in a little blogging funk lately, as I have many times before. I love to write and share, but sometimes I feel like I have everything and yet nothing to offer all at once.

At any rate, I’ve also been busy. And while all of the following could be their own individual posts, for now I’ll just kind of summarize them:

-This pregnancy is both physically and mentally challenging. Ever since 23 weeks, when in my twin pregnancy I had a super-short cervix and went on bedrest, I’ve been crossing my fingers and been grateful to still be standing on two feet, going to work, and pretending like everything is normal. Now at just about 29 weeks, everything is sort of normal, I guess. They aren’t checking my cervix anymore. I get weekly progesterone shots as a “just in case”, which have been worth the money. That said, this baby I’m growing is a beast. About 3 pounds, and I’ve just started the third trimester. I don’t have gestational diabetes. I am super heavy and get lots of braxton hicks. I carry low and my belly doesn’t get as big as I wish it would, which is what happened last time as well. And those braxton hicks cause me to constantly worry, even when I don’t realize I’m thinking about it. The fear of an emergency, pre-term labor and delivery is something I imagine many women don’t think about. But when you’ve only been pregnant once before and that’s exactly what happened…it’s hard to think otherwise. Nevertheless, I’m drinking more water than I could describe and taking some precautions that seem to be helping the BH’s go away. It’s hard, hard, hard to be pregnant with toddlers. I can’t just put my feet up like I used to. They aren’t self-sufficient. They need help with so many things. Clearly I’ll never be the kind of pregnant woman who can like, go running and clean the house with ease. My body already feels done and tells me it’s had enough constantly. So it’s been a draining mental and physical struggle.

-I got a van. A total mom-van. And it’s awesome. A 2015 Toyota Sienna – I feel like I’m driving a yacht. There’s so much space, so many features, so many things I didn’t think I needed but I actually totally do. I’d love to write a review of it soon. Even though I’ve joined the ranks of a stereotypical “van mom”, I really don’t care. It’s practical, it’s comfortable, it’s spacious.

-My dog has stopped eating regularly again. I say “again” because we’ve already been down this road with her, years ago. In fact, I was pregnant with the twins, bending over to hand feed her and then blogging about how much it was driving me crazy…

Since the twins were born, I got Sadie on a pill that essentially makes her hungry. Our problems were 99% solved for years. Now, my vet would like to get to the underlying issue and doesn’t want to prescribe the pill anymore. Fair enough, but in stopping that pill, Sadie has gone back to her old ways, which include flat-out refusal of foods. All foods. Until she’s so hungry I can hear her stomach growling and digesting acid all the way across the room. Until she goes outside and eats grass, and lives on that and some peanut butter.  I truly believe a good amount of it is mental, because she also only wants me to feed her and in a certain way, in a certain order (my god, she’s as bad as the twins. Everyone in this house needs a routine!). I also think she has some acid reflux. We give her Pepcid, but she still has anxiety about eating. The vet wants her to have an endoscopy, which is just about $2,000. That’s kind of a lot of money. And we just got a van. The pill was “working” before, though not addressing her underlying health needs. I just don’t have the time, the mental energy for one more dependent creature, and the physical capabilities of bending over, standing up, repeat – in order to close her mouth around a piece of food in order to swallow it. I had a blood pressure crash a few weeks ago trying to do just that, thanks to the bending over. So – I’m wishing we never stopped the pill at this point and hoping I can convince the vet to prescribe it again, at least while I’m still pregnant. Because I just – need my dogs to eat without my intervention, as I can’t take on one more needy creature. 🙂

-The twins are approaching 3. A few more months. My due date, in fact, is three days before their birthday. Their nightly routines have started to dwindle and change all on their own – it seems like something we sort of needed to wait out, or change ourselves if we couldn’t take it anymore. At any rate, the kids are both happy, enjoying some warmer weather and super excited for this new baby, and other than the stresses of my dog and my pregnancy, life is good.


2 thoughts on “Spring

  1. I love my van SO MUCH. I inherited my parents’ 1999 Toyota Sienna and then when that died I went and bought a 2015 Odyssey and I loooove it. We were just renting a sedan and were able ti fit all three kids in there but ugh! Vans all the way!

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